“Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.” – Psalm 127:1

The 8th Psalm of Ascent was written for Solomon, the young man who would someday be King. It’s only fitting the Lord spoke to me about my call today.

Now bear with me. This is longer than normal, but I’m going to get a bit personal.

God had been speaking many things to my heart over the first three days, but each venue today brought a specific challenge to my calling as a Pastor. To be faithful. To trust Him. To find satisfaction in Him alone.

In my battles with depression years ago, I used to say to myself, “Nice guys finish last, idiot. And you’re trying to do things the right way, Will, so get used to losing. Get used to failure. Get used to watching God do things through others. You’ll never experience that.”

The emotions behind such thoughts were extremely powerful. And very tormenting.

While Jesus helped me to control thoughts, they still have taunted me from time to time.

“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.” – Matthew 5:6

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The truth is nice guys don’t finish last. Jesus promises otherwise. So, I must keep being faithful.

Because there was another guy who thought he knew it all. An alpha male who took life by the horns. When Jesus asked to borrow his boat so he could teach the multitudes, Peter had no issues.

But then Jesus started to tell him how to do his job.

“And Simon answering said unto him, Master, we have toiled all the night, and have taken nothing: nevertheless at thy word I will let down the net.” – Luke 5:5.

The enemy of our souls doesn’t fight fair. The same one who whispered the lie that nice guys finish last often bludgeoned me with the accusation of, “You’re not a nice guy, Will. You fail Jesus all the time”.

That’s the double-edged sword of depression. It appeals to your pride, and then smashes your face into the mud because you know you have nothing to be prideful about.

Peter obeyed the Lord, and Jesus did a better job with Peter and his boats than Peter ever did! But when Peter realized how foolish he’d been to question the Lord, he fell on his face before Jesus.

“Depart from me; for I am a sinful man, O Lord…And Jesus said unto Simon, Fear not; from henceforth thou shalt catch men.” – Luke 5:8b and 5:10b.

Jesus didn’t pile on and say, “You’re right. I’m out of here you arrogant know-it-all failure.” He called him to the ministry!

“It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.” – Psalm 127:2

There in the middle of the Sea of Galilee, the same spot where Jesus called Peter, the Lord reminded me that serving Him isn’t about stressing out and taking life by the horns.

It’s about a good night sleep because I’m resting in the One who loves me infinitely, longs to bless me, and still wants to use me when I fail.

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Isn’t our Jesus awesome? I’m so thankful for a God who loves me. Who speaks to me right where I’m at despite all my frailties and hang-ups. If God’s entrusted you with an area of service, are you resting in His love?

Below are two videos I posted earlier on Facebook.

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